Funny (and not so funny) Happenings as a Lifeguard

So...I have a "hit list."

At work (the Kroc Center) I'm known at work as the nice, quiet one, who does her job. Among the boys, I'm also known as the one who doesn't like to get wet. It's not that I don't like to swim or anything, I just hate getting into the splash pool at the bottom of the slide to signal to the lifeguard at the top that the bottom is clear and he/she can send the next person down. Why? Because the water is about 50% of the time cold, when I get out I am freezing, and then I'm wet for the rest of my shift! Also, chlorine kills your hair, so I try not to get it wet, since I'd like to still have pretty hair when I go back to college at the end of August! The boys just don't understand this though.

Around 2:30 this afternoon, I descended the steps to get into the splash pool at the bottom of the slide. I had pulled off my shirt and shoes so that I was only in my swimsuit and was already pretty cold. As I started getting deeper into the water (which is only about 3.5 feet high), I noticed that the water was colder than usual, and pulled up my arms and began shivering. Jarrett, the guard I was rotating out of the splash pool, was watching me get into the water. When I saw that he was watching me, I gave him a big smile and said sarcastically: "Oh this feels wonderful! Just wonderful! Doesn't this water feel just great?" and descended the last two steps down into the pool. Jarrett didn't say anything. I reached out my hand to take the rescue tube from him, when he suddenly began splashing me (lightly)!!

"What?!" I cried out, backing away from him towards the stairs. This only provoked him to splash me even more. "Jarrett! Stop!" I laughed, splashing him back a little. He stopped, and I walked towards him again. I stopped in front of him, and held out my hand again. He splashed me again, and I turned away from him. I began backing up again, when he said: "Wait! Come here!"

I turned back around, and met his eyes. There was a tender look in them, and then he leaned in like he was going to kiss me!

"No, no, no!!!" I shouted, covering my mouth and backing away from him. He continued to follow me, and I turned my body away from him, when he suddenly lunged, turned me around to face him, and then dunked me into the water!! Completely submerged me!!! I came up spluttering. I looked at him, and he was laughing pretty hard. "See? Now you're all one temperature!"he said.

"You..."I growled, and then started splashing him. He just laughed. He was already soaking wet as it was. Then the lifeguard at the top of the slide whistled at us. We looked up, she pointed at the kids, with a look in her eyes saying: "That was funny, but can they go down now?" I gave her the signal that they could and Jarrett left the pool. I went into the little corner I discovered where you get splashed the least, and can still rescue kids quickly, and was freezing the rest of that rotation!

Later I witnessed Jarrett do the same thing to another girl, Jani, who works there. Completely submerged her in the water, which I thought was weird, since that girl loved getting wet! But whatever...Jani came out of the water looking quite shocked, right as I walked by heading to guard the competitive pool. "Jarrett! Oh my gosh!" I yelled. He looked up and started laughing again. I went into the guard office to drop off my tube and he came in right behind me. "Kristen," he said, " when are you going to learn that boys just want to destroy your life?"

"Ha," I laughed, as I left the office. "I'm going to destroy yours later." Pathetic comeback, but it was the best I could come up with at the time.

I was however scheming about pushing him into the water fully clothed later. Later when I was in the guard office with another guard, and good friend of mine, Kate, I told her about what Jarrett did to me and Jani, and she told me of an experience of what he did to her (cannonballed right next to her).

"Him. He and Nick both need to be thrown into the water," I said.

Nick is another guard that likes to torment me. Whenever we're close by in rotation spots, he'll always splash me. If I'm sitting in a guard chair watching the water, he'll come up behind the chair, and tilt it forwards so much that I almost always fall into the water. Whenever I try to be sneaky and get him back, he always catches me. So far I've always tried it when he's standing. When we clear out the pool once and hour for five minutes (to scan the bottom for harmful objects), I'll come up behind him and try to push him in. I've come close a couple of times, but then he'll turn around at the last second, open his arms, and I'll back up quickly into the wall. "You know," he said to me once, "I just want to pick you up and throw you in there."

"I'll get you in there before you get me," I replied.

He just laughed at me. I will though.

I told all this to Kate, and she said I should totally get those two back. We then rotated out of the guard office, and she told Jarrett of my plans.

At 8:00, after we closed down rec swim, Jarrett came up to me, and said, "So Kristen, I hear I'm on your hit list?"

It took me a moment to figure out what he was talking about. A hit list? What? Then I realized what he meant, and smirked at him. "Yes, you're one of two. I'd watch your back if I were you."

"That's pretty scary."

"Oh it is. You don't want to be on my hit list."

"But I am. This will be interesting."

"Indeed it will."

Jarrett then went home and I stayed for another two hours since I was helping close tonight.

So being a lifeguard is pretty fun. My co-workers and I are all getting to be really good friends (seeing as how we all work about 50 hours a week, so our only social life this summer is at work). I like it a lot.

However, can I just say that I have never had a job so intense as my job at the Kroc Center? I lifeguarded at two separate facilities before working at the Kroc, and both of those jobs were cake--sit around and watch people swim, blow the whistle occasionally, and then go home. Hardly anything ever happened. And at Boulder Beach I got a killer tan (I was dark for a year). But the Kroc Center is a whole different story.

Not only was lifeguard training incredibly intense, but inservices are demanding as well. But I won't bore you with those details. Just know that all of the lifeguards there know how to swim extremely well, are in shape, and get constant training.

So far at the Kroc Center here's what's happened since I've started working there:
--Ambulance/Fire Department arrived to take a woman to the hospital after she sat in one of the jacuzzi's too long and became very sick in the locker room area.

--Fire alarm went off. Had to usher everyone in the aquatics area, and entire building, outside. We still don't know if it was a real fire or a prank.

--Lightening. Lights went out. Had to get everyone out of the water and deal with complaints.

--Kicked multiple people out, something I never had to do at any of my previous jobs. People are such smart-alec's at the Kroc Center! For me, it's three strikes and you're out.

--Saved a couple children, although really, those were very easy. I was already in the water at the bottom of the slide, and just hurried over to them with my tube to keep them from drowning. Simple saves.

--Too many "incidents" too count. If you don't know what I'm referring to, don't ask.

So, being a lifeguard is great, but there's definitely a lot to pay attention to. Our managers are cracking down on us for splashing each other and messing around, which they should, but it's just going to make it that much harder for me to get Nick and Jarrett, and whoever else decides to mess with me next, back. But I'll get 'em back before the end of the summer. Count on it.

Blood is Shocking

So I've decided that I'm actually going to start updating this blog. I want to get back into writing, and have decided that this is a good way to do it.

This morning I had to go to a lab to get my blood drawn. You see, I'm trying to get on accutane for my acne, but since accutane is an incredibly intense drug, I have to get two blood tests to make sure I'm healthy enough to take it, and also to make sure I'm not pregnant (if I were pregnant, accutane would severely damage the fetus within the first 1-3 weeks of pregnancy). Anyways though...

So I arrive at the lab about 11:00 this morning. I hadn't eaten anything beforehand, because I was required to be fasting so that they could get an idea of what my blood levels are without sugar in them. I should tell you that I am absolutely terrified of needles, blood, shots, etc... I haven't always been this way. Just in the last five years I've developed a strong fear of getting my blood drawn, medical shots, IV's...basically anything that can go into my skin. But I took some deep breaths and told myself it would be over before I knew it. I had also brought a PB sandwich with me to eat afterwards, as I knew I would need food soon after my blood was drawn.

I walked into the lab office and the receptionist greeted me. I handed her the form the dermotologist had given me, she made a copy of my insurance card, and then led me into a small room. The phlebotomist came in about five seconds after she left. She gave me a friendly smile and said hello. I hate it when people know that I'm scared so I just gave her a big smile and said hello back. She looked over the form, and nodded.

"Well this won't take long at all," she said.

"Oh good," I breathed a sigh of relief. The sooner I'm out of here the better.

"Now you are fasting right?"

"Yes."

"Which arm do you want to use?"

"This one," I said lifting up my left arm. Then I thought about it, "Well, no, actually, let's use my right arm. I write with my left hand."

"Okay," she grabbed the needle and vile. I looked at it and then looked away. Then I looked back at her.

"Um...do most people say that this hurts?" I asked.

"You know, some people say it does, but most just say it's a little poke. And you have two veins here for me to use." She pointed out where she was going to poke me, probably thinking it would comfort me to know where the needle would enter, but instead it only made me feel a little queasy. She then tied a tourniquet around my bicep, and wiped my arm with an alcohol pad.

I looked away, and she poked the needle in. It didn't hurt too bad. It really was just a little poke. She left it in for about ten seconds and then took it out. She put a guaze on my arm and asked me to apply pressure to it while she closed the vile. I did so.

"See? Now that wasn't so bad was it?"

I smiled. "No, no it wasn't. Better than I thought it would be."

Then she turned away, and about five seconds later I started feeling sick. Really sick. Everything started to go blurry. I started breathing deeply, trying to keep my head up. The phlebotomist turned around.

"Whoa. Whoa, are you okay? You don't look so good."

"I'm okay, I'm okay." And then my face suddenly felt very cold.

"You're very pale. Would you like some apple juice?"

"Yeah, sure, if that's okay."

"Well of course! Huh, I didn't draw that much blood from you."

"I know it's interesting, because you really didn't," the room was getting blurrier. "But I do faint when my..." dizzy spell. I took a deep breath... "when my blood sugar gets low. And I haven't eaten anything all morning." I moved to put my head on the counter.

"Okay well this should help," she handed me the apple juice. I drank some of it.

"And I'm terrified of things like this. Getting my blood drawn."

"You are? Well just take some deep breaths. We might have to have you put your head between your knees."

I moved to do just that. Then everything turned grey. I couldn't see anything clearly. I moved my head back towards the counter.

"Would you like a pillow for your head?"

"Oh no, no, I'm fine, I'm fine."

"You don't look fine."

And then suddenly I couldn't hear anything anymore. Everything felt like a dream. I was so confused. Nothing made sense. Then the next thing I knew I was waking up. My head was on the counter. I raised it up slightly, but then felt dizzy again. I heard voices. I felt someone behind me, and realized that they were holding me up. It was the receptionist. The phlebotomist was in front of me. I could sense that she was very close, and realized her arms were out to catch me if I fell forwards out of my seat. I lifted my head up even more and looked around. Things were becoming clearer.

"How are you?" I heard the phlebotomist ask.

"I feel better," I replied, still in a daze.

"You still look sick. Do you still feel sick?"

"Yes. Everything is blurry. I don't know what's happening."

"Let's put her on the floor and raise her feet up."

Well, after having two weeks of Red Cross Training to become a lifeguard at the Kroc Center, and after hearing that, I realized what was going on with me. I was in shock. My body was reacting to my fear in the only way it knew how: by sending all the blood to my major organs to protect itself. That's why my face had suddenly felt so cold. The blood was rushing from my face to my trunk. And by so doing, blood had been taken away from my brain, and my brain had been deprived of oxygen. Since my brain had been deprived of oxygen, I had fainted. My body had shut down for a few minutes to give itself a chance to get everything working again. My dad later described it as the restart key on a computer. My body had simply shut itself down and then restarted itself.

However, I was still in shock, and because of that had the possibility of fainting again. So they laid me down on the floor, and raised my legs up on a chair. The receptionist then ran to get a doctor. I looked around the room, and at the phlebotomist. I was feeling better and more calm now that I knew what was going on with me.

"You gave us quite a scare there," she told me. "Does this usually happen to you?"

"Only when I don't eat. And I knew that I might feel queasy after this so I had a sandwich prepared. It's out in my car. I thought I'd at least be able to walk out there after this. But I guess not."

"No, definitely not."

I laughed. "I agree." She relaxed when she saw me smiling and laughing.

The doctor arrived and I was smiling and laughing with the phlebotomist. She smiled and then looked me over. "You're okay," she said, and then explained what happened to me.

"Yeah, I know. Two weeks of Red Cross Training. I know I'm in shock." Everyone smiled and gave small laughs at that. They all looked surprised that I knew what was going on with me.

The doctor left and I stayed on the floor for a few minutes more. Unfortunately my room was easily visible to all in the waiting room so there were two other adults staring at me. So embarrassing.

The receptionist then spoke. "So what happened?"

"Everything just went blurry," I told her. "And the next thing I knew I was waking up."

"Yeah you scared us! You weren't answering any of our questions!" I guess I was out for a few minutes then.

"I didn't hear any questions."

Soon enough I was able to sit up again. I drank some more apple juice and they gave me a piece of candy. They then asked if I felt like I could sit in the waiting room until they felt I was well enough to drive home. I told them that was fine. I stood up and began walking.

"You're shaking," the receptionist said. "But not too bad."

"Yeah, I'm shaking," I said. But we all knew it was to be expected after something like that.

I sat down in a chair and the other two adults went into other lab rooms. The receptionist gave me some crackers and I began to eat them. I was fine for about five minutes. Then I started feeling sick yet again.

"You okay?" the phlebotomist asked, when she came out of one of the lab rooms.

"I'm all right. Not as bad as earlier."

"Let's get you some more juice," she poured me some more apple juice and handed it to me.

"Thanks," I smiled and took it from her.

I still felt sick though. I leaned me head against my arm. The receptionist had left the office for a short time, and when she came back she looked at me.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"You sure?"

I took a deep breath then said, "No."

"Okay I'm going to clear out a room for you, and have you lie down on a bed." And she did just that. I followed her into a room and lied down on one of those typical patient beds every doctor's office has. I began to feel better. The phlebotomist came in. After a few minutes she said, "You know, I've been doing this for 35 years and I've never had anyone get sick on me twice."

My eyes were closed but I smiled. "I'm a special case," I grinned.

She laughed. "Yes you are."

About ten seconds passed and I said: "I think I'm going to call my parents and have them come get me. I probably shouldn't drive home."

"No, I was just thinking the same thing."

"But I really don't want them to know this happened to me."

"Well, give it a few minutes then, and we'll see how you're feeling."

A few minutes passed and I was feeling much better. I told her so.

"Okay now sit up."

I did so. "I feel fine." As soon as I said that I felt queasy. Gosh darn it!

"As good as you did lying down?"

I sighed. "No."

"Lie back down."

I did.

"Your hands are still so white."

I looked at them. They were very pale. I shrugged. "Whiter than usual anyways." We needed some humor in the room.

The phlebotomist laughed. "'Whiter than usual,'" she repeated. "Well I suppose it's a good thing you're fair. People won't be able to tell what happened as easily."

I smiled. Then I called my dad, and explained the situation to him. He said he'd be there soon. Other nurses/lab techs/ etc. popped their heads in. One told me a story of her daughter who is also terrified of needles. Apparnently this girl went to go donate blood at a lodge with her friends, and didn't even make it past the front door. Once she saw everyone lying down with needles in their arms she was out. I was glad someone else shared my wretched fear.

My dad arrived at the lab. The receptionist led him back to the room and I sat up. My dad looked at me, his eyes got wide (I guess I looked pretty bad), then to the receptionist, the phlebotomist, then back at me. I smiled at him. He relaxed.

"What are you doing?! Making things intersting for them?"

Everyone gave a small laugh at that, and then I got up and followed my dad out of the lab. I stopped at my car and grabbed my sandwich. I had to be at work in thirty minutes. I decided I was well enough, or would be well enough, to work. I ate my sandwich on the ride home and felt better. Then I hurried inside the house and grabbed my bag full of lifeguard stuff. Then I hurried back out and my dad drove me to work.

Luckily they assigned me to a station where I could sit down first, in the competitive pool area. I was still feeling a little queasy, but well enough to watch people swim laps back and forth and make sure no one was drowning. About ten minutes later I heard someone say:

"Hi Kristen!"

I looked down. It was my mom, with a huge smile on her face.

"Hi Mom!"

"I heard you fainted."

"Yeah...it was pretty embarassing."

She laughed and nodded, but I could tell she was just glad to see I was okay. She was at the Kroc Center signing Amy and Kate up for swim lessons.

Later when she came to pick me up and drive me back to my car, she said she hadn't realized how truly terrified I was of needles. She had been teasing me the last few days, because I kept saying how much I was dreading going to the lab.

"Bet you feel pretty bad, huh?" I teased her.

"I do actually. I'm really sorry. I really didn't realize that it was a legitimate fear of yours."

"It's okay." All was forgiven.

So we arrived at the parking lot, I got into my car, and drove home! I have to get another one of these tests done in four weeks though. At least next time around precautions will be taken. The phelebotomist told me that she would have me already lying down in a bed, apple juice ready to go!